This Is Why I'm Cold!

It was inevitable that there would be incidents at the Christmas Party. Especially considering events that have materialised in the past when a free bar is involved. I'm disappointed that I retired early, although it was probably the sensible option to be fair. Not that I have any recollection of this departure other than friends assistance in detailing what occurred. Basically after consuming Vodka, Gin and bottles of red wine I decided that it was time to escape. Without reason I ran and fled on a bus, for what reason I don't know.. 

 My night then started around 11:30PM because that's when I realised that I wasn't in Kansas anymore. Instead I had arrived in Chatham, everywhere was covered in a thick blanket of snow and I was near to hypothermia. For whatever reason, I had chosen to leave the restaurant without almost every possession, including a wallet, umbrella and most importantly a coat! Wearing just a shirt I obviously hadn't thought my actions through and due to the weather conditions I was stranded in outer Europe (sound familiar?). Thankfully the parents International Rescue were able to assist but were delayed due to problems on the motorway. I was frozen but a local hero provided a coat and warmth, admittedly I was tempted into his vehicle to survive but it was a strange experience. When his partner arrived at the collection point I specifically heard her state "Who the f*ck is this?" I'm that guy! Eventually I was rescued but I have had to cancel my subscription to life today because I have wandered too far from the yellow brick road.....