Saturday, September 18, 2010

To Boldly Go

PrideImage by joedawson via FlickrAfter originally being told that I wasn't allowed to see the children, I was able to collect them from school and spend time with them yesterday afternoon. I really enjoyed the hours that we spent together and they appeared more enthusiastic about university which was encouraging and lifted a weight off my shoulders. As the time came to handing them back to their mother I attempted to take a few photos and literally fell apart. Tears filled my eyes and I struggled to hold it together! My daughter realised straight away and I could see the colour drain from her face. As I kissed them goodbye at the door, their mother hovered in the background. She looked at me with the glare I remember so well, "You're the one doing this" she scorned but I couldn't find the words to respond. My son had also reacted now and I could see his bottom lip quivering! I can't describe how hard that was but I really felt like walking away from the university dream at that moment. They're everything to me and I'm worried that being away from them I won't be the father they deserve but then if I quit I'm not setting the right example. I hope that I will look back one day and know that I made the right decision!!! I was able to see them again this morning, the good ending this time as we hugged and I promised that I would see them soon!

To celebrate my departure to Leeds, I organised a farewell gathering in Dartford last night. Several friends and family attended, drinking was the order of play but it took a while for everything to get started. Not sure what was wrong with the barmaid at Whetherspoons as she attempted to make obscene conversation with us multiple times. We moved on and then as more participants entered the arena the night started to develop. The local nightclub beckoned and we politely responded with the admission price and started throwing shapes all over the dance floor. Eventually I ended up with a stiletto and then I made a friend with the other stiletto and we both used the prop to maximise the shapes being thrown. He took it to the next level by drinking alcohol that had been poured into the stiletto, I draw the line there! The night ended with meeting my partner at my house, we exchanged gifts, mine being food and hers being a boxed gift! I should have made more effort especially as she had taken time to wrap the treat!! We failed at packing, this makes me happy though because she is exactly the person I want to be with and moving to Leeds with her will begin an exciting adventure!!!
Enhanced by Zemanta